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28 Oct 2021 17:33:58
Ole Gunnar Solskjaer walks into a Bank to cash a cheque. As he approaches the cashier he says, "Good morning, Ms could you please cash this cheque for me? "

Cashier:"It would be my pleasure. Could you please show me your ID? "

Solskjaer:"Truthfully, I did not bring my i'd with me as I didn't think there was any need to. I am Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, Manager of Manchester United".

Cashier: "Yes, I know who you are, but with all the regulations and monitoring of the banks because of impostors and forgers and requirements of the legislation, etc., I must insist on seeing ID. "

Solskjaer: Just ask anyone here at the bank who I am and they will tell you. Everybody knows who I am. "

Cashier: "I am sorry, Mr Solskjaer but these are the bank rules and I must follow them. "

Solskjaer, "Come on please, I am urging you, please cash this cheque. "

Cashier: "Look sir, here is an example of what we can do. One day, Tiger Woods came into the bank without ID. To prove he was Tiger Woods he pulled out his putter and made a beautiful shot across the bank into a cup. With that shot we knew him to be Tiger Woods and cashed his cheque. "

"Another time, Andre Agassi came in without ID. He pulled out his tennis racket and made a fabulous shot where the tennis ball landed in my cup. With that shot we cashed his cheque. So, sir, what can you do to prove that it is you and only you? "

Solskjaer stands there thinking and thinking and finally says, "Honestly, my mind is a total blank. there is nothing that comes to my mind. I can't think of a single thing. I have absolutely no idea what to do. I don't have a clue. "

Cashier: "Will that be large or small notes, Mr Solskjaer? ".


1.) 28 Oct 2021 17:55:28
Don’t give up the day job.

2.) 28 Oct 2021 18:13:08

3.) 28 Oct 2021 18:17:12
Am here all week. Try the veal.

4.) 28 Oct 2021 18:27:46
Gotta love a Shrek quote.



26 Apr 2021 10:03:39
Hi All.

ED's, and everyone.

There has been a lot of noise this last week that the Glazers would sell if an offer from anywhere between £3 and £4 Billion came in.

Maybe wishfull thinking and click bait.

Is there any legs to this now the EFL has failed after supposed 2 years of planning.

Or will the brass neck Glazers just put another mouth piece in charge and keep taking their dividends and consultancy fees?



{Ed002's Note - There are no efforts being made to sell the club at this time.}

1.) 26 Apr 2021 10:21:06
I think when selling an asset of that size normally you'd the owner to be putting the feelers out that they are looking for a sale. The sheer numbers involved means that its unlikely someone will just rock up knock on there door and ask them if they want to sell.

So unless the Glazers are putting the feelers out I very much doubt we'll see a sale anytime soon. In fact the current thinking is they want to be institutional owners, or at least half of the siblings do.

2.) 26 Apr 2021 14:18:04
The Glazers are going to milk this club as long as they can and then sell it

If they any decency left in them then they would sell it to someone who would not only have the best interest in the club, but they work to improve the community within the club.

Personally after last week incident. The government need to get involved with FA, UEFA and FIFA and "force" them to sell up.

To be honest it is what it is, but I'm done done. with the sport. The six clubs (owners) can go "screw" themselves.

3.) 26 Apr 2021 15:08:23
Shane, the problem is that Malcolm's kids haven't shown anywhere near the same nose for business as their dad did.

Most of their own investments have done poorly, as such I think the plan has changed somewhat and they want to keep the best asset they own for as long as they can.

The super league also isn't going to be going anywhere, and if/ when they can get that off the ground then that could potentially double the club's income. They'd be fools to sell the club before either the idea is totally crushed or it actually happens.



05 Apr 2021 20:22:59
What a goal by Jessie Messi!

Sign the lad up@.


1.) 05 Apr 2021 20:41:26
Maybe Declan Rice and £20 million and we will sell him?



25 Mar 2021 21:23:52
So. Just a yes or no, if it was possible. Eds, would also love your input.

Fantasy. Because I do not think it could happen.

Swap. Martial for Calvert Lewin.
Straight swap?


{Ed077's Note - Hell yeah.😂😂

1.) 26 Mar 2021 02:51:52
Absolutely, DCL has really kicked on this season. Great work rate, intelligent movement, unselfish play, clinical in front of goal and a aireal threat.

2.) 26 Mar 2021 06:26:02
Definite yes, he just scored 2 goals against the might of san marino.

Thats makes him the best player in the history of association football.

3.) 26 Mar 2021 09:02:17
If we have motd fever I think James Ward Prowse would be a great addition.

4.) 26 Mar 2021 09:46:18
Straight swap? I’m sure Everton would go for that as long as they could swap Tom Davies for Bruno.

5.) 26 Mar 2021 10:16:08
DCL while had a good game last night for England against a Conference side, I think his performances over the season deserve merit.

He has 19 goals in 30 games for Everton. It's often said that if a striker scores 1 in every 2 games then that is a good scoring rate. DCL almost has a 2 in 3 scoring rate.

While Martial might have more skill, he fails with the mentality and struggles to turn that talent into performances.

{Ed077's Note - and all goals from open play.

6.) 26 Mar 2021 10:23:37
Nick Pope too, he only touched the ball 5 times but the clean sheet was top drawer.

7.) 26 Mar 2021 10:57:50
I mean if we want to get MOTD fever then that Jesse Lingard kid looked very promising, creative, forward thinking, great work rate and looks like he can only be about 20, so loads of potential.

8.) 26 Mar 2021 10:55:29
“ So. Just a yes or no, if it was possible. ”

Clearly it wasn’t 🤣.

{Ed077's Note - well I said yes.}

9.) 26 Mar 2021 15:19:33
You know better than that scooby. 🤣🤣🤣.

10.) 26 Mar 2021 16:44:54
yes, in a heart beat.

11.) 26 Mar 2021 19:34:25
He's a fantastic player. We won't get kane, we won't get Haaland but I honestly believe DCL is very attainable and will instantly make us a better team. I think he would a brilliant signing.

12.) 26 Mar 2021 20:39:13
We won’t win the league with DCL up front so May as well keep Martial.

13.) 26 Mar 2021 22:13:02
That's what we are doing with the manager Eric so why not🤷‍♂️.

14.) 27 Mar 2021 20:15:01
Touché Ken 😂.



21 Mar 2021 15:20:33
So, Mike Smalling due to miss 20th game this season today. Muscle issues.

Some (me included) thought he might have been a better option than Vic or Bob. Think Smalling Evans at the back?

Seems he would have been more a fixture in the Phil Jones medical suite.


{Ed077's Note - he's a Roma player. Let them deal with the concerns and we just move on and let it go I say

1.) 21 Mar 2021 15:56:42
Fair point Ed077.

Hard to pipoint our last good purchase at CB. Was it Ferdinand?

{Ed077's Note - Vidic surely.

2.) 21 Mar 2021 16:26:14

Yes, you are right. Ferdinand 2002. Visit 2006.

Still, that's a long old time ago!




EnglishStan's rumour replies


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08 Jan 2022 16:50:39
He or she!




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22 Dec 2021 09:56:03
Them cones don't put themselves out Shappy.




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03 Sep 2021 10:00:57
Didn't Jose say something like Fred was "offered ". Never heard if him, but it was him or no one.




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19 Aug 2021 20:42:47
Isn't he JesseMessi's agent?




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28 May 2021 21:48:00
Was It some years back, The Equaliser gave Jones a new contract to protect the asset!

Whats the saying. Dick Turpin and masks.





EnglishStan's banter replies


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18 Jan 2022 23:09:47
Maze. WTF. Its as clear as the nose on your face that AWB and slabhead are not good enough. The economy of a small island aside. The economy side is f all when the so called defence ships goals for fun.




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12 Jan 2022 10:15:41
Am sure I found this site around the time Tevez and Masherano were seen outside old Trafford. They of course would go on to sign fir West Ham and Liverpool. Long time lurker. Had a few different names as forget logins, new devices etc.




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22 Dec 2021 09:59:35
Bruno really has lost his spark since CR7 returned.




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20 Dec 2021 17:49:21
Shappy. Am a zn admirer of your observations. Ot telly is a decades old thing now, isn't it. A player is outstanding in a team that plays X way. Let's just shoe horn him in axway that's Y. Mikateryan (spelling) a classic example. Not forgetting the coach (Klopp), he would have you and me running through walls. Has Cloughs Forest all over it.




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20 Dec 2021 11:15:37
Great Post there Shappy, and a nice little observation re Klopps Dortmund team where the sum is greater than its parts and other teams thinking they can nick a little of the magic. Similar to Cloughs teams of the 80's and our own experience with Birtles, Davenport and Webb (Jesus, Neil Webb! ) .